The Hidden Side of Communications – Providing Free (and Untrained) Psychological Services

Communications professionals are sometimes also expected to counsel colleagues, in other words, act as the organisation's psychologist, even though they usually lack the necessary training, writes Heleri Michalski, a work-life peer counsellor and communications expert, in an essay for Äripäev.

In every team, there are people who have taken on the roles of a lightning rod, a clown, or a diplomat. They all serve one very specific purpose – to defuse tension within the collective. Not all of these employees have to be from the communications team, presumably more likely they are from the HR department. But there are certainly some in the communications team as well.

Communications professionals are mainly selected for their personality traits - usually more diplomatic, more pleasant types who get along well with (almost) everyone. More conformist than average and better at having a thicker skin. A pleasant superficiality comes with the job because communications work requires constantly shifting focus from one topic to another and rapid response. More in the article: Secrets one doesn't want to know More in the article: Dangerous conversations

More in the article: Give responsibility to those responsible

The vulnerability question

In order for the communications manager to achieve their work objectives (and KPIs), such as getting a colleague to give a presentation or write an article, they sometimes have to consciously take on the "listener" role within the organisation. Providing free counselling to colleagues is essentially written with invisible ink in their contract, because it's clear that when putting a colleague in the spotlight, all sorts of human fears and insecurities can arise. Of course, the communications manager has to be encouraging and explain the situation from every angle. What is familiar to them may be exciting and terrifying at the same time for someone suddenly thrown into the limelight.

Talking about fears makes people vulnerable. Which, in turn, is something that binds us on a human level, writes psychotherapist Tommy Hellsten in the book "The Race Against Time." In a work situation, however, the following questions arise: How much is it reasonable to allow vulnerability in working relationships and take on the psychological challenges of colleagues? Where is the line drawn in dealing with work-related and personal problems?

In such a situation, when training is lacking, the listener role may not be easy or even appropriate at all. Listening to colleagues can uncover their painful experiences, choices, or lack thereof. As a result, however, the one doing the listening may burn out the fastest.

Such a role is a difficult position even for someone with a thicker skin. In simpler cases, you may fall into a gossip trap that can be difficult to get out of. The listener may feel pressured to take sides in a conflict, develop prejudices they didn't have before, fall victim to manipulation, or get caught in the crossfire, so to speak.

Secrets one doesn't want to know

Emotional dissatisfaction in the work environment rears its head precisely when employees have not received adequate feedback on their work for an extended period. In such a situation, there are an increasing number of excuses from employees as to why one goal or another is difficult or even impossible to achieve, and tasks are passed between colleagues like hot potatoes. Declining motivation, however, can be a contagious phenomenon and diminishes the entire team's performance.

In such an environment, there are more people who need to get things off their chest, complain, vent, etc., because postponing work tasks creates frustration for everyone. So one colleague listens to another on the assumption that if they ever need it, they will be listened to as well. They discuss absurd situations, pour out their hearts, and exchange personal information.

One day, however, the confidant becomes a superior or subordinate, roles change or are swapped. But the secrets remain, creating discomfort and tension.

In the course of communications work, boundaries often become blurred, because being at the centre of the information field, one unintentionally becomes aware of the actual invisible working relationships and chains of command more quickly. At one point, however, one may find yourself in a situation where there is too much contradictory information between the lines, and some secrets may be heavier than one can bear.

Psychological counsellors have their own methods for dealing with other people's worries and problems, which require separate training. However, the communications team may not have such preparation.

Actively listening to a colleague is a skill in itself, and giving competent advice is an even more multi-dimensional phenomenon. To know what kind of advice to give someone who is in a difficult work situation, one has to know their mental state and what they need in addition to supportive words.

One of the greatest realisations I gained while studying to become a peer counsellor is how acutely one should be aware that even when recommending things like a morning raw juice diet, a certain form of exercise, medication, a domestic helper, or reconciling with a family member for the sake of better well-being, one is taking responsibility for another person's life. One day, they may come and say, "I did it because you recommended it!" So even the most ordinary coffee room chats can serve up a painful boomerang effect some time later.

Dangerous conversations

Listening to colleagues' worries is a perfectly acceptable social norm, but only to a certain extent. Recently, there has been an increasing awareness of how dangerous such voluntary advisory roles and friendships between colleagues can become.

Psychology Today contributor Nir Bashan recommends focusing on learning to set boundaries instead of forming friendships. One of the key arguments in the article is that true friendships and work relationships are based on different expectations.

It is often only realised in hindsight that the work environment has become emotionally toxic. Sometimes, however, the psychological challenges are not recognised at the management level, and if situations are allowed to run their course, someone with these "grounding qualities" from the team ends up becoming the counsellor or listener. Based on gut feelings, challenges are always assessed through the lens of one's own experiences when advising colleagues. However, different personality types need to be recognized for the crisis stage the person is in.

If managers do not have time to restore emotional balance in the work environment alongside their work duties, or lack the necessary skills, then a point has been reached where the question should arise: do we need someone to help?

For professional counsellors too, it is an art in itself to recognise the moment when to refer someone to a more competent expert. That is why a professional counsellor is always the better choice for resolving people's tensions and worries and should be a conscious choice made by management. Especially in situations where psychological problems are disrupting the work culture and processes.

Give responsibility to those responsible

If a communications professional has found themselves in a role where they are also expected to provide psychological support to their colleagues, they should ask themselves a couple of follow-up questions. Can I change or improve anything in the organisation according to my own judgment? Are the final decisions and responsibility in my hands? If I have suggestions for improving the work environment, will they be heard? If the answer to any of those questions is "no," then it would be wise to politely decline responsibility and suggest who might handle the situation.

The management of an organisation must ensure that in an emotionally, mentally, and certainly also physically demanding work environment, employees have access to a psychological counsellor, an organisational psychologist, or a mental health worker who would collaborate with the HR department and management. Of course, it all depends on the size of the collective, but an organisation whose key factor is people should still offer certain opportunities during these challenging times, which have sometimes been called the age of the burnout epidemic.

*The article was originally published in Äripäev, the largest Estonian digital journal focused on entrepreneurs.